Category: Personal Care

As you know, I’m a big ball of anxiety (disorders). For a long time, I thought I just had social anxiety. But in my early 20s, I realized it was more. I didn’t just hate being around people – I also hated leaving my home. Enter agoraphobia. My perception of agoraphobia was what you see in movies or shows – a panic attack as soon as you open the door and step one foot outside of your home. That represents the far end of the spectrum of what agoraphobia looks like. But it also looks like feeling intense anxiety whenever you go someplace that’s not a designated ‘safe’ place in your head. It’s compulsively Googling everything you can about a new location so that you know everything about it. It’s avoiding public transportation and standing in line because it makes you queasy. I wanted to talk about the differences between social anxiety & agoraphobia.

Note: I am NOT a mental health professional. I share these things based on my own experiences and to raise awareness as a mental health advocate. Please, please, please if these things sound familiar or relatable, talk to a professional so that they can figure out the best way to move forward!

What Social Anxiety Is Like

Imagine every social interaction feeling like a test where you either pass or fail. You can’t just… talk. You have to say the right thing, and do the right thing, and ‘people’ the right way. It feels like everyone is watching you and judging everything that you say and do. Social anxiety is the intense fear of doing or saying something embarrassing.

What sets it off: Meeting new people, eating in front of others, public speaking… basically anything where you might be the center of attention, even briefly. It’s usually worse when you’re around ‘authority figures’ like teachers, bosses, doctors, or anyone that you feel has power over you.

How it feels: Blushing, sweating, heart pounding, that awful feeling in your stomach. All that plus the dread that you’re about to make a fool of yourself. One of the worst parts for me is the after-interaction analysis. It’s when my brain thinks back on all of the things that I said or did and

What Agoraphobia Is Like

Agoraphobia is about feeling trapped or helpless. At its core, it’s the fear of places or situations where getting away or finding help feels impossible (especially if you have a panic attack). For me, it’s like there’s this lizard part of my brain says: “DANGER DANGER” whenever I’m in a place that’s not home, work, or my usual grocery store.

What sets it off: Crowds, public transportation, lines, being outside alone, even small enclosed spaces like elevators can be panic triggers. Going any place that’s new or unfamiliar.

How it feels: Panic attacks are super common with agoraphobia. People sometimes try to avoid these situations so much that they can barely leave the house. For me, I guess you could say it’s mild. When I’m struggling with agoraphobia I get an intense spike of anxiety and digestive issues right when it’s time to leave my home.

When Social Anxiety & Agoraphobia Get All Tangled Up

For some people, social anxiety and agoraphobia go hand-in-hand. I use this analogy to help showcase the differences.

Think about going to a supermarket you haven’t been to before.
Someone with agoraphobia: Feels anxious at the thought of being in a new environment. Googles the store to try to get a feel for the layout so it feels more ‘familiar’. Isn’t primarily concerned with social interactions. Would still feel anxious even if the store was empty of customers and had an automated self-checkout system with no human interaction.

Someone with social anxiety: Feels like people are judging them for what they put in their cart. Feels anxious about the possibility of having to interact with cashiers or other shoppers. Rehearses asking for help (or is unable to ask for help) or what to say at the checkout line several times beforehand. Would feel little to no anxiety if the store was empty of customers and had an automated self-checkout system with no human interaction.

And here I am like why not both social anxiety & agoraphobia?

Even if the store had no people in it, my anxiety-brain would still be sending triggers of panic, anxiety, and unease. Knowing whether your anxiety is mostly social, mostly agoraphobia, or a mix of both helps you find the right support.

I hope this was helpful in showing the differences between the two.

Share your experiences on social anxiety & agoraphobia in the comments and let my anxious lizard brain know that it’s not alone!

No matter the nature of your relationship, setting boundaries is a critical component to maintaining a healthy connection with your partner.

Seeking a close partnership should not have to conflict with your needs.

Becoming one as a couple means holistically knowing yourself, understanding your personal and emotional needs, and being able to communicate them to your significant other effectively.

It isn’t always easy to understand what your boundary issues are and how to communicate them.

We’ve created a relationship boundaries guide to help you on your path to a loving and healing cohabitation. 

[Sidebar]: Say goodbye to communication breakdowns! Unmask the hidden gems of your relationship and spark joy with our Couples Communication Course on sale now.

What Are Healthy Boundaries in Relationships?

Have you ever felt you’re giving too much of yourself to your partner, and you’re feeling resentful? That’s where boundaries come in. 

Boundaries are the lines you draw to define what you’re comfortable with in your relationship. They allow you to respect your own needs and values while also considering your partner’s. You’re not building walls but rather creating a healthy space where you both can thrive. 

According to Brene Brown, researcher, author, and motivational speaker, “Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves even when we risk disappointing others.”

When you set healthy boundaries, you’re saying, “This is who I am, and this is what I need.” It’s a way to keep your relationship balanced, respectful, and fulfilling for both of you.

Healthy boundaries are a reflection of your principles, rules, and guidelines that you have set for yourself. A break in those boundaries arises when your partner disrespects, ignores, or isn’t aware of those principles or personal needs.

Types of Boundaries in Relationships

There are different types of boundaries you can establish with your partner. Each type addresses a specific aspect of your relationship and helps you maintain a healthy, respectful, and fulfilling connection. Here are some of the key areas where setting boundaries can be particularly beneficial:

• Emotional boundaries: These are about protecting your feelings and mental well-being. It’s knowing when to share and when to keep things to yourself.
• Physical boundaries: This is all about your personal space and comfort level with touch and intimacy.
• Time boundaries: You’ve got a life outside your relationship, right? Time boundaries are like a clock that helps you balance your relationship with your other commitments and interests, ensuring you have enough time for yourself and your partner.
• Communication boundaries: These boundaries are about how, when, and what you communicate with your partner and how they communicate with you.

21 Examples of Healthy Boundaries in Relationships

There are many types of boundaries in relationships, as well as boundaries in a marriage, that can establish better communication and intimacy.

Some conversations may be easier than others, but it’s better they occur with preparation rather than during the tense moments after an argument.

Examples of Emotional Boundaries To Set

1. Saying No

You may find it easier to sacrifice your own needs for your partner’s out of a fear of upsetting them.

However, if they ask something of you that goes against your principles, disrespects your time, or forces you to sacrifice something important, it’s okay to say no. It doesn’t have to be harsh, but learn to say it assertively. 

2. Refusing to Take Blame

Sometimes, your partner may place the blame on you out of hurt or guilt. This behavior does not mean their anger is your fault. Do not let them skirt responsibility by manipulating your emotions. Acknowledge their pain, let them know you are there for them, but assert that you will not accept responsibility for their actions. 

3. Expecting Respect

You deserve kindness and loving communication. If you feel your partner is speaking from unjustified anger or with a disrespectful tone, you are within your right to remove yourself from the scenario.

Let them know that if they want to have a conversation, it must come from a place of respect. 

4. Dictating Your Own Feelings

When you’re part of a couple, opinions and emotions can feel blurred. Learn to decipher your feelings from your partner’s and their perception of your feelings. If they speak for you, correct them and kindly ask that they do not dictate your emotions for you. 

5. Finding Your Identity Outside of the Relationship

Codependency can lead to a melding of identities. “I” becomes “we,” and the “you” gets lost in the mix. Remember that you are not just one half of a whole but your own person with passions, interests, and vibrant intelligence. It’s okay to have a sense of self separate from your partner.

6. Accepting Help

Some people are more independent and find difficulty relying on their partner in tough times. If you need help, it can be good to establish where your boundaries are and what you do and do not want help with.

You may ask for help with finances but need space when dealing with family issues. This balance can be a delicate tango, but open communication leads to a smoother rhythm. 

7. Asking for Space

Sometimes we just need to be alone in emotional upheaval. In a relationship, it can seem like you never are. Asking for space may feel to your partner like you are pushing him or her away, even though that’s not your intention.

Alone time is perfectly healthy and a key to maintaining your own identity and sorting through your problems. If you aren’t clear about needing space, your partner might feel neglected or that you’re avoiding them. Establishing upfront that you like to spend time alone will help later on. 

8. Communicating Discomfort 

Whether your partner tells a hurtful joke or crosses a physical line, learning to articulate your discomfort clearly will help in setting your boundaries. Let them know what you will not tolerate, and plan a course of action if he or she crosses that boundary.

Phrases like “Please don’t do that, it makes me uncomfortable” or “I don’t like it when you ( ex: use that word, touch me there, use that tone)” are clear and concise. 

9. Sharing Mutually 

It’s okay to take things slowly at the beginning of a relationship. Don’t feel pressured to share everything upfront or feel you have to share first for your significant other to open up. Vulnerability should be mutual, with both partners checking in and creating a safe space for sharing. 

10. Sticking Up for Yourself

In an argument, you or your partner may say things you regret that are mean or ugly. Establish that you won’t accept him or her speaking to you that way. You have intrinsic worth and deserve to be spoken to kindly. Make it known that you need an apology and that you need your partner to acknowledge the hurt their words have caused. 

11. Choosing to be Vulnerable 

Vulnerability should not be demanded. Of course, it is an important component of a healthy relationship, but you should never feel pressured to open up about a difficult topic in any stage of your relationship.

You share your feelings and experiences on your terms. You should feel safe to communicate that you may need time to discuss specific topics or memories. 

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Examples of Personal Boundaries

12. Your Right to Privacy

There are many different levels of privacy. You may share a home computer, but keep your email password to yourself. This choice is reasonable. Your belongings, thoughts, texts, journal entries, and even topics as big as past relationships or traumas are yours to share or not share at your discretion. Infringement on those boundaries is not acceptable. 

13. The Ability to Change Your Mind

Your choices are your decision, as is the option to make a new one. If you change your mind, your partner should not make you feel guilty for it. Be clear with your reasoning or simply state that you decided to change your mind. Of course, being open is important, but it should happen on your terms. 

14. Your Right to Your Own Time

You get to dictate where and with whom you spend your time, alone or apart. Maybe you don’t love going to Monday night football. Establish that Monday nights are your alone time or your weekly wine night with your pals. Perhaps you need to be by yourself for a few days after a big fight; you are within your right to ask for that. 

15. The Need to Handle Negative Energy

A personal boundary can also be one that you set for your own behavior. It is important to navigate unhealthy anger and resentment so you aren’t bringing negative energy into a shared space.

If you can’t let it out on your own, ask for help. Share your negative emotions and lighten those toxic feelings by being honest about your mood. 

16. The Freedom to Express Sexual Boundaries

The beginnings of physical intimacy with a new partner is an exciting time, but navigating personal boundaries in sex can be awkward or even scary. Openly communicating your needs or discomforts is essential, though finding the words can be tricky.

Remember that every step you take requires enthusiastic consent from your partner, and you should never feel pressured into anything. Talk with each other regularly. Share fantasies and discuss boundaries. Honesty and vulnerability are powerful.

17. The Freedom to Express Spiritual Boundaries 

Your beliefs are your own, no matter how much you may or may not have in common with your partner in terms of spirituality or religion. You and your significant other should respect each other’s beliefs, foster and encourage each other’s spiritual growth, and be open to learning about the other’s culture or faith. 

18. The Right to Remain True to Your Principles

Set a boundary with yourself that your principles remain in place no matter who you are dating. Of course, you can change your mind as your conversations with your partner open new doors to new ideas. But you shouldn’t feel pressured to adopt his or her stances out of fear of upsetting them. 

19. The Ability to Communicate Physical Needs

Learn to communicate what your body needs. Are you a vegetarian and don’t want meat in the house? Are you an early riser who needs to be in bed before 10:00 pm? Then make sure your partner respects your physical needs by not making loud noises or watching TV late into the evening.

On the other hand, learn about your significant other’s boundaries. If they prefer a later bedtime, work out an arrangement rather than pressuring them to go to sleep before their biological clock allows them to. 

20. Your Right to Your Material Possessions 

Deciding what to share and what to keep for yourself is never an easy task. Some couples open joint bank accounts, while others forego that for financial independence. Material and financial boundaries are commonplace in every relationship. 

21. Your Ability to Manage Your Own Time

Another relationship boundary to set for yourself is learning to manage your time in a way that doesn’t disrespect your significant other’s.

When you’re single, you can put off doing the dishes as long as you want. However, in a relationship, your time is not just your own. If you agree to date at 8:00 pm, it’s essential to stick to your word.

That means learning to manage your time respectfully, even when you’re alone. 

How Do You Know It’s Time to Set Boundaries in Your Relationship?

It can be tough to recognize when your boundaries are being crossed, especially in a love relationship. You might find yourself feeling drained, frustrated, or even resentful towards your partner without fully understanding why. 

In his book Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No, therapist and author Henry Cloud states, “One of the first signs that you’re beginning to develop boundaries is a sense of resentment, frustration, or anger at the subtle and not-so-subtle violations in your life. Just as radar signals the approach of a foreign missile, your anger can alert you to boundary violations in your life.”

If you constantly feel you’re giving more than you’re receiving or if you’re compromising your own needs and values for the sake of your relationship, it’s probably time to start setting some boundaries. 

Other signs that you might need to establish boundaries include feeling disrespected, unheard, or like you’re losing yourself in the relationship. Trust your gut – if something doesn’t feel right, it’s worth exploring why and considering whether a boundary could help.

What Are Common Ways a Partner Will Cross Your Boundaries

Even in the most loving relationships, boundaries can be crossed. Sometimes, it’s unintentional – a result of differing expectations or communication styles. Other times, it may reveal deeper issues, such as a lack of respect or an unhealthy power dynamic. Here are some common situations that can occur.

Disregarding Your Need for Space

Everyone needs alone time, but some partners may struggle to respect this need. They might constantly text or call when you’ve asked for space, or they may pressure you to spend all your free time together.

Ignoring Your Privacy

A partner who crosses boundaries may invade your privacy by snooping through your phone, email, or personal belongings without permission. They might also share private information about you with others without your consent.

Dismissing Your Feelings

When you express your thoughts or emotions, a partner who doesn’t respect boundaries may dismiss or invalidate them. They might say things like “You’re overreacting” or “It’s not a big deal.”

Controlling Your Decisions

Some partners may try to control your choices, from what you wear to who you spend time with. They may use guilt, anger, or manipulation to pressure you into doing what they want.

Pushing Physical Boundaries

A partner who doesn’t respect physical boundaries may pressure you for intimacy when you’re not in the mood, or they may touch you in ways that make you uncomfortable.

How to Set Boundaries in Relationships

It’s one thing to know what your boundaries are, but it’s a whole different ball game to establish them, especially if that means unlearning bad habits. Try to avoid reactionary anger when setting boundaries.

We often don’t know what our boundaries are until someone crosses them. However, there are better ways to communicate to your partner what they are. 

Here are some thoughts on establishing your boundaries in a relationship:

• Be clear and specific: Use “I” statements to express your needs and feelings, such as “I need some alone time after work to unwind” or “I feel uncomfortable when you look through my phone without asking.”
• Communicate calmly and respectfully: Choose a time when both you and your partner are relaxed and open to discussion. Avoid blaming or attacking language, and instead, focus on expressing your own perspective.
• Be consistent: Once you’ve set a boundary, stick to it. Consistency helps your partner understand and respect your limits.
• Be open to compromise: While it’s important to stand firm on your non-negotiables, be willing to find a middle ground on issues where you and your partner can both make adjustments.
• Seek professional help if needed: If you’re struggling to set boundaries or if your partner consistently disregards them, consider couples therapy to work through these challenges with the guidance of a trained professional.

Setting your boundaries is an ongoing process. As your relationship evolves, so may your boundaries. Keep the lines of communication open, and don’t be afraid to revisit and adjust your boundaries as needed.

How will you set boundaries in your relationship?

It may be scary to be vulnerable and admit what you need from your significant other, but you know yourself and what you need better than anyone else.

A loving partner, the partner you deserve, will respect and value the boundaries you have set.

Over on Patreon, I’m doing monthly themes and this month, we’re talking about Self-Love Languages. I’ve talked about it before but instead of taking inspiration from the original Love Languages, I really wanted to put my own spin on it. “Self-Love Languages” just wasn’t working for me and that was throwing my whole creative vibe off. I put up a poll on Patreon and I have to give a huge thanks to Lauren O. for her suggestion of ‘pathways’. That’s how the Self-Care Pathways was born.

Self-love happens when we learn how to nurture ourselves in ways that feel good.

When we are able to give our needs attention, when we make time for ourselves, when we’re truly checking in and saying ‘what’s going to make this day better for me?’ so many wonderful things start happening. Our stress levels lower, our boundaries get better, we feel increased self-esteem, and more happiness.
And the most important part of that is – most of those changes start with small steps and tiny, everyday, actions.

Enter the Self-Care Pathways.

These pathways represent the different ways we can nurture ourselves. Whether it’s through caring for our bodies, connecting with nature, expressing our creativity, or engaging in mindfulness, (or a little bit of everything) each pathway offers a unique avenue to explore what self-love means to us personally. Ask yourself this:
Does this make me feel loved?
There’s no right or wrong way to explore these pathways. It’s about finding ways to fill up your cup, make sure that you’re feeling loved and taken care of, and that you’re making yourself a priority.

Pampering: focusing on physical wellness and things that make your body feel good.
Soothing: creating tranquil & comforting environments that cater to your sensory needs
Adventure: stepping out of your comfort zone, or routine, & seeking new experiences
Social: valuing meaningful interactions, support systems, and time with friends
Creative: channeling energy into creative projects and finding joy in art
Nature: finding peace and connection when outside or surrounded by nature
Play: celebrating play and connecting to your inner child and having fun
Growth: figuring yourself out, self-improvement, & curiosity about the world around you
Mindful: cultivating inner peace and calm and being in the present moment

What Are Your Self-Care Pathways?

I’m brushing the dust off of my keyboard right now. It’s been a while – hiiiiii! Diane on Patreon suggested that I write a blog post on how I stay organized when I have so many tasks and subjects to deal with. That is a great question and it’s taken me a really long time to figure out the answer for myself. And then I get bored and like to switch it up.

Here are the details on how I stay organized.

First off: I need color. I need to be able to pick my own colors. You know how you log into a productivity app and they have that soulless color palette? I can’t do it. There’s something in my creative brain that can’t stand those boring colors.

I began this year wanting to do something different so I started using Coda.io. Huge learning curve, lots of features, but I spent more time trying to figure out how to make things juuuust right that it lasted for three months. It did help me stay organized but it also got me off track. Here was my cute landing page though!

I ended up going back to Trello.

I’ve been using Trello for years but I get bored and I venture off into internetspace looking for something better and then I always end up coming back. I like it because it has lots of ways to organize and customize your ideas, tasks, and work. Once you get the hang of ‘Lists’ and ‘Cards’ it’s pretty user-friendly and easy to figure out.

Here’s my current Sailor Moon decorated template. Did I mention that I NEED color?

Mostly I just use the purple list titled “Make Magic Happen“, the rest of my board is 99% ideas and notes and things that I need to remember for one reason or another!

I have my April To-Do List: A checklist of specific tasks that is constantly added to, updated, and worked on.

Then I have my Daily Social Media To-Do List: A checklist that I *try* to finish every day which has things like responding to comments and messages on different social media platforms, checking Etsy messages, and checking my email. I start with a blank list every day.

Finally, I have my Monthly Patreon To-Do List: This is a checklist of everything I post on Patreon each month. I get everything done and then start over when a new month comes. It’s very general like ‘Discount codes’, and ‘coloring pages’, while the specifics go on my April To-Do List.

Aaaand that’s how I keep things organized.

Over this last week, I’ve been playing a cute productivity game that I’d like to give a mention to.

It’s called Spirit City: Lofi Sessions and I love it. I’ve been spending the first few hours of my day with it playing in the background while I work.

Here’s the description: Spirit City: Lofi Sessions is a gamified focus tool, set to a soothing lofi soundtrack. Discover and collect Spirits, customize your cozy virtual space, and facilitate your real-life tasks with a collection of handy features designed to improve concentration and ease stress.

• It has different times of the day, morning, afternoon, evening, and nighttime.
• It comes with a lo-fi radio station with a few different playlists and it also lets you play YouTube videos.
• You can decorate your character, the room, and you also find cute little ‘spirits’ that keep you company.
• There are many ambient sounds you can add like a fireplace crackling, thunder, rain, wind, birds, and a few others!

Here’s my room and character! I love the cute little spider spirit (named arachknit), he’s adorable!

Spirit City: Lofi Sessions is perfect for anyone who enjoys cute aesthetics, relaxing background music, and needs a little gamified boost to their productivity and it really helps when I’m having anxious days.

You and your husband are going through a whole new level of bumpy. 

Whatever’s going on between you, though, one of the best ways to deal with it is to write it out.

Put your thoughts and feelings into words. 

Journaling is one way to do this.

But writing a letter to your husband, who shares responsibility for your marriage, can get you even closer to a solution. 

So, where do you begin?

Why Write a Letter to Your Husband?

Writing a letter to your husband might sound quaint in today’s digital age, but it’s a potent tool for enhancing your relationship. This simple act can be transformational, promoting healing, boosting self-awareness, and fostering compassion.

Here are several compelling reasons why you should consider writing a letter to your husband:

• Clarity and Honesty: Letters allow you to articulate your feelings and thoughts clearly. This format helps you be direct and specific about what you’re feeling and why, which can be more challenging in verbal exchanges.
• Conflict Resolution: A letter gives your partner the space to process your words without the immediate need for a response. This can prevent the escalation common in face-to-face arguments, paving the way for understanding and compromise.
• Emotional Safety: Writing can serve as a buffer, softening the initial impact of a conversation about sensitive topics. It opens the door to more calm and focused verbal discussions later.

The ultimate goal of writing to your husband should be to improve your relationship, not to exacerbate issues. It’s important to approach this task with the right intentions, avoiding criticisms or passive-aggressive tones. Instead, focus on expressing:

• Healing and forgiveness
• Empathy and vulnerability
• Intimacy and kindness
• Understanding and respect
• Love and connection

A well-crafted letter can be a constructive way to express needs, ask for changes in behavior, or communicate boundaries in a respectful and caring way. It’s a profound tool for nurturing your relationship and ensuring both partners feel heard and valued.

How Do I Write An Emotional Letter to My Husband? 

Troubled relationship letters aren’t necessarily a harbinger of doom.

More times than not, they’re an invitation to discuss the problems in your relationship and to get on the same page. 

With that in mind, let’s get some dos and don’ts out of the way: 

Letter-Writing Dos: 

1. Do be honest about how you feel, and don’t leave out anything important. 
2. Do remember to show appreciation for something he’s said or done.
3. Do try to read it from your husband’s perspective before revising it.

Letter-Writing Don’ts: 

1. Don’t use this letter to accuse, blame, or criticize your partner. 
2. Don’t write the letter when you’re tired, angry, or intoxicated.  
3. Don’t skip the revision process.

[Sidebar]: You might consider the Couples Communication Course. In this online course, learn healthy communication skills and build the intimacy you’ve always wanted in your relationship.

Letter to My Husband During Difficult Times: 8 Sample Letter Ideas for Different Situations 

Look through the following example letters for ideas on what to write to your husband or boyfriend regarding whatever you’re facing together.

Make a note of the points you want to make and anything you’d like to add to make your letter more personal. 

1. Letter to Husband Who Hurt You

Dear Husband/[Name], 

I know you’ve come to dread the words, “We need to talk,” so I’m trying a letter this time. I don’t want to leave you wondering why I’ve been pulling away from you lately, so it’s best just to be honest with you about something that happened the other day. 

[Describe what happened in neutral language, without making assumptions about anyone’s intentions and without projecting your emotions on anyone. The way you see the incident in question is probably not how others perceive it.]

I’m writing this because I believe you would want to know if something you said or did has hurt me, so I’m letting you know. Please return the favor if there’s something I’ve said or done that has caused you pain. 

I love you!

Your wife

2. Letter Telling Your Husband You Are Not Happy.

Dear Husband/[Name], 

I don’t know what you’ve noticed in my behavior lately, and I’d like to hear any questions you might have. 

Whatever we’re both going through right now—separately and as a couple—I want to be honest with you about what I’m feeling and what I’d like to do about it. 

So, I’m writing this to let you know I am struggling. While I don’t blame you for this, I haven’t been happy for months now, and I’m still trying to pin down the reasons why. 

What would really help me right now is if we could talk for at least an hour at a time at least once a week to check in with each other. I want to know where you are, too, because I want us both to be happy. 

If you agree, what time works for you?

Your wife/[Your Name]

3. Letter to My Boyfriend During Difficult Times

Dear Boyfriend/[Name]: 

You’ve always had a way of knowing when I need a hug, and I love that about you. Now that we’re going through this together, I’m gonna need more of those than ever. 

I knew this situation would be challenging, but I doubt I could get through this without you. There’s no one else in the world I’d rather have with me.  

I trust that, whatever happens, we will find a way together to work through it. And I hope you know I’m ready to do my part. Let’s talk about what we each need, and I’m committed to helping you get your needs met.

This situation has been so painful for both of us, but I hope you won’t withdraw. As we work this out (and I know we can), please keep me at your side instead of leaving me behind.  

You have my trust and my whole heart. 

Your girlfriend/[Your Name]

4. A Letter to My Husband About Our Relationship

Dear Husband/[Name], 

I’ve noticed some changes in our marriage and would like to talk to you about them. Our regular check-in talks with each other have become far less frequent, and I’d like to reverse that trend and spend more time connecting with you. 

I’ve been grateful for the connection we have, and I want us to spend time each week not only keeping it alive but making it stronger. I believe that’s possible because the foundation is still there. 

I know we disagree on some things, but at our core, we make a phenomenal team. I know life can get in the way of couple-time, but this is me pushing back. I want to spend more time with you because you’re still my favorite person. 

Please let me know what day and time work for you for an hour of talking (and whatever that might lead to). 

Your wife/[Your Name]

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5. Sample Letter to Husband About Feeling Unwanted

Dear Husband/[Name]: 

It’s not easy to write a letter about this, especially when I’m not sure whether writing this letter will lead to anything I want. But you need to know that I’ve been feeling not only taken for granted but even unwanted by you. 

I remember the way you used to look at me, and that look isn’t there anymore. What I see more often now is boredom, distraction, condescension, or annoyance. I don’t remember the last time you looked genuinely happy to see me. 

I know you’re busy with work and with everything else on your plate. But if you’ve fallen out of love with me or grown tired of me, please just tell me — with as much kindness as honesty. I won’t break. 

So, talk to me, please. Let me know where we stand. 

Your wife/[Your Name]

6. Encouragement Letter to My Husband

Dear Husband/[Name]: 

I wanted to write this letter to tell you what I’ve noticed in you, which has helped me feel stronger despite the added stress and exhaustion we’re both feeling. 

You seem to have just taken everything in and, with your trademark combination of intelligence and humility, reached a decision we can both feel good about, even though it’s not an easy one. 

I have complete trust that, whatever happens, we’ll draw some good from it. Thank you for always hearing my input and considering my suggestions when you have such a tough decision to make. It’s one of the many things I love about you. 

I hope this letter serves as a reminder of my trust in you. You’ve more than earned it. I love you and am continually impressed by you. 

Love, your wife/[Your Name]

7. Letter to My Husband about Starting Couple’s Counseling. 

Dear Husband/[Name]: 

I don’t want every conversation we have about our marriage to turn into an argument. We need a skilled and patient referee to help us work through our challenges. I’ve done some digging and found someone I think we’ll both like, and she has an opening. 

We have a tentative appointment set, but I can change it if a different time would be more convenient. Please talk to me after you finish reading this letter so I can tell you the date and time, and you can tell me whether you can be there. 

If getting our marriage headed in a better direction is still something you want, I really hope you’ll be as ready to try this as I am. 

I love you! 

Your wife/[Your Name]

8. Lonely Wife Letter to Husband

Dear Husband/[Name]: 

I often think about our early marriage days and all the fun times we spent together. Remember when spent that one rainy day talking for hours about our future and our dreams about a house and where we wanted to travel?

Life has become so busy for both of us, but especially for you with the demands of your job. I know it’s taking a toll on you, but it’s taking a toll on me, too — and on our marriage. I feel so lonely sometimes and miss the connection and fun we used to have.

I know you have to put in extra hours right now, but even when you’re with me, it feels like you’re somewhere else. You’re on your phone or computer at home more and more these days.

For the sake of our marriage and happiness, I need us to discuss this situation and how we can find more time to connect and be together — without distractions. When can we talk this week?

I love you so much and want to have the best marriage possible.

Your wife/[Your Name]

When to Write a Letter to Your Husband Who Hurt You

When you’re feeling hurt, it can be really tough to get your words out right in the heat of the moment. Writing a letter to your husband offers a quieter, more reflective way to let him know how you feel. It’s like having a heart-to-heart without the pressure of an immediate reaction. Here are some situations where putting pen to paper might just be the best approach:

• After a Betrayal: If your trust has been broken, a letter can help you express the depth of your hurt and the impact of his actions, facilitating a starting point for healing.
• Following a Major Argument: When a significant disagreement leaves you feeling misunderstood or disregarded, writing can clarify your perspective and express your feelings without interruption.
• When Feeling Neglected: If you feel overlooked or taken for granted, a letter can highlight your feelings of neglect, helping your husband understand your need for more attention and appreciation.
• During Ongoing Disagreements: For recurring issues that seem to circle without resolution, a letter can break the cycle by outlining your thoughts and expectations clearly, opening the door to potential solutions.

How to Give Your Emotional Letter to Your Husband 

Here are some ideas on the timing and presentation of your letter: 

• Try to avoid presenting it when he’s exhausted or agitated about something.
• Don’t present the letter right before bedtime or as he’s leaving for work.
• Find a calm time when you’re together to offer the letter and be present while he reads it.
• Don’t pester him to read it or quiz him on its contents.
• Let him decide when to read it and when to talk about it with you.
• If he avoids responding to it, ask for a specific time you can talk together.
• You can also use a shared notebook so that he can write a response.

You know your husband/boyfriend better than we do, and you probably have some idea of the best (or least worst) timing. Just remember to put your heart into your letter, keep it honest, and don’t try to guess how he’ll respond to it. 

Final Thoughts

Navigating the choppy waters of marriage can be challenging, but remember that communication is the lighthouse guiding you to safety. Writing an emotional letter to your husband can be a cathartic and transformative experience.

In this letter, pour out your heart, express your deepest feelings, and reaffirm your commitment to the journey ahead. Be honest yet compassionate, highlighting both your love and your concerns. This isn’t just a letter, but a bridge built with words, spanning the gap between hearts.

Is your guy sending signals that he might not be straight?  

Plenty of women have found themselves dating a guy only to discover he’s more interested in other men. 

But how can you tell for sure? 

Unless you ask him directly, there’s no surefire way to know if your man is gay or bi (and even then, he may not tell you).

But some tell-tale signs may make you raise an eyebrow. 

How to Tell If a Guy is Gay: 31 Signs Your Boyfriend Isn’t Straight

Is your boyfriend’s behavior making you question his sexuality? Is your “gaydar” sounding in your head, but you’re not sure you’re right?

Here are 31 potential signs that may reveal he’s attracted to men.

1. He Has Predominantly Male Friendships

Your boyfriend seems to strongly prefer the company of other men, often opting for male-dominated gatherings, outings, or activities. His consistent choice might not be just about shared interests; it could also hint at a connection with men that goes beyond platonic friendship. 

Pay attention to the depth of these relationships and the context in which he prefers male company. They could signal something more about his sexual orientation.

2. He Shows Disinterest in Women

Even though he’s in a relationship with you, there’s a noticeable lack of interest when it comes to other women. He might not comment on women who are generally considered attractive, nor does he engage in conversations about female attractiveness. 

His behaviors with other women could suggest that his romantic and sexual interests lie elsewhere and not with women.

3. He Admires for Male Aesthetics

He has a keen eye for the male form and often expresses admiration for the physical appearance or style of other men. His appreciation goes beyond the casual comments that might be expected in a heterosexual man. 

Does he talk about other men’s looks, physique, or fashion with a level of detail or enthusiasm that suggests personal interest? It might reflect a deeper attraction.

4. He Engages with LGBT Communities

Noticing a pattern of him spending time in LGBT-friendly spaces or attending events that celebrate or support the LGBT community? 

His comfort and active participation in these settings, sometimes without any explicit personal or social obligation, could suggest a sense of identity within the community. This voluntary immersion and engagement can signal a personal affinity for the LGBT experience.

Related: Signs He Is Gay and Pretending To Be Straight

5. He Enjoys Gay Content

Observe his reactions to gay characters, storylines, or themes in media. An enthusiastic or particularly invested response to LGBT narratives can be revealing. It might be more than just support for representation; it could also resonate with his personal feelings or experiences. 

When gay content elicits a strong or emotional reaction from him, perhaps his own identification with the characters or situations is coming through.

6. He Shows a Lack of Sexual Interest in You

How’s your sex life together? A lack of sexual interest towards you that doesn’t seem to stem from other relationship issues or personal stressors is revealing. 

His disinterest is even more pronounced if he seems to avoid physical intimacy or if his affection feels more platonic than romantic. If you notice these things, his sexual attraction might be for men more than women.

7. His History of Relationships is Revealing

Take a closer look at his past relationships or the lack thereof. A pattern of brief, unenthusiastic dating history with women, coupled with close, intense friendships with men, suggests his romantic and sexual preferences are for men. 

Sometimes, a lack of deep emotional connections with past female partners can also be a telling sign of his true sexual orientation.

8. He’s Interested in Gay Culture

If he has a deep interest in gay culture, including music, art, or TV shows that prominently feature gay themes or are popular in the LGBT community, it could be more than just a casual interest. 

It could reflect a personal connection or identification with content that resonates with him on a level beyond mere appreciation.

9. He Avoids Gender-Specific Pronouns

Pay attention to how he speaks about past relationships or potential attractions. The deliberate avoidance of gender-specific pronouns or vague descriptions of past partners can be a subtle hint. 

His linguistic choice might conceal his authentic attractions, especially in conversations where heterosexual men might typically use female pronouns.

10. He’s Unusually Physical with Men

What are his physical interactions with other men? Does he seem more comfortable, frequent, or intimate in his physical contact with men compared to women? 

These could range from lingering touches to more affectionate, close physical proximity that goes beyond what might be considered common between platonic friends.

11. He’s Secretive About His Social Media Activity

His social media behavior might hold clues. If he’s secretive about his accounts, frequently interacts with gay or bisexual men, or follows many LGBT influencers without a clear reason, it could signal a personal connection. 

This digital footprint, especially if kept under wraps, might reveal aspects of his identity he’s not openly sharing with you.

12. He Feels Strongly About LGBT Issues

What are his emotional reactions toward LGBT rights and issues? If he displays a passionate or personal investment in LGBT causes beyond general support for equality, he might feel a deeper connection based on his sexuality. 

His strong reactions could stem from a personal identification with these struggles, even if he’s not ready to reveal his honest sexual preferences.

13. He Avoids Commitment

Notice if he seems uncomfortable or evasive about future plans that assume a heterosexual partnership, such as marriage or having children in traditional ways. 

He might have an internal conflict about living a life that doesn’t align with his true self, suggesting he might not be straight.

14. He Prefers Ambiguous Relationships

Does he prefer to keep your relationship undefined or resist labeling what you have? This ambiguity might allow him to avoid confronting his sexuality while maintaining a semblance of a heterosexual relationship, revealing possible doubts about his sexual orientation.

15. He’s Uncomfortable with Labels

He might express a distinct discomfort or rejection of labels when it comes to his sexual orientation. While some people genuinely prefer not to label themselves, in the context of other signs, this could be a way of avoiding the admission of a non-heterosexual identity. 

His reluctance to define his sexuality with traditional terms might suggest he’s still exploring or coming to terms with his true preferences.

16. His Jokes and Comments Have Gay Undercurrents

He might frequently make jokes or comments that have subtle gay undercurrents. This humor can sometimes serve as a safe way to express his true feelings or test the waters to see how others react to LGBT topics.

Related: Suspicious Of Your Boyfriend Being Gay?

17. He Frequently References LGBT Friends

Mentioning LGBT friends frequently, especially in situations that don’t necessarily call for it, can imply that he identifies with the LGBT community. His constant referencing could be a way of aligning himself with the community without making a direct statement about his own sexuality.

18. He Is Especially Sensitive to Homophobia

While many are rightfully against homophobia, his reactions could be particularly visceral or personal. 

Does he seem unusually affected by homophobic remarks or situations? It might be because these comments hit too close to home, reflecting his own fears or experiences.

19. He’s Interested in Your Male Friends

It might be more than casual curiosity if he shows an unusual level of interest in your male friends, like asking about their relationship status or personal life. 

It could be a subtle way of exploring attractions or forming connections that align with his sexual orientation.

20. His Body Language Around Men is Revealing

Observe his body language when he’s around other men. Does he lean in closer, mirror their actions, or maintain eye contact longer than usual? 

These non-verbal cues can often reveal attractions or affinities that he might not share with you or others. 

21. He Avoids Deep Conversations About Sexuality

If he consistently steers away from discussions about sexuality, especially in a personal context, it could be a defense mechanism. 

He has discomfort with confronting or discussing his own sexual orientation openly, or he may not have completely accepted it himself.

22. His Behavior Changes Around Known Gay Men

Notice any shifts in his demeanor or behavior when you both are spending time with openly gay men? An increase in nervousness, excitement, or engagement could signal a personal resonance with them, hinting at his own sexuality.

23. He’s Defensive When Asked About Sexuality

Does he become noticeably defensive or evasive when the topic of his sexuality arises? Perhaps it’s related to more than just discomfort with the topic. 

Defensiveness can often be a protective response when someone isn’t ready to discuss or disclose their sexual orientation.

24. He’s Curious About Your Views on LGBT Matters

He’s probed into your thoughts on LGBT relationships and rights, and it’s not just out of general interest but to gauge your openness and acceptance. He’s wondering how you might react if he reveals himself to you.

This line of questioning is a safe way for him to explore how you’ll feel if he announces that he’s bisexual or gay. It could be a way of helping him decide how to best share the truth. 

25. He Has Distinctive Fashion or Style Choices

While fashion alone isn’t a direct indicator of sexuality, it might be a strong clue. If his style significantly aligns with trends or aesthetics popular within the gay community, and you’re seeing other signs, take it as reinforcement. 

His style may be his way of connecting with his identity and the gay community without overtly stating his sexual orientation.

26. He Shows Selective Secrecy About His Past

He may be particularly secretive about parts of his past, especially those that could provide insights into his sexual preferences. 

Maybe he offers vague or incomplete stories about past relationships or experiences, possibly to avoid revealing his attraction to men.

27. His Personal Space with Men is Closer

Have you noticed he maintains a closer physical proximity to men than is typical for casual friends? Does he lean in close during conversations or brush shoulders with guys in groups?

If it seems he’s getting too up close and personal for your comfort, your instincts may be spot on that he has an attraction to other men.

28. His Music and Media Preferences Have LGBT Themes

His playlists, movie collections, and bookshelves are heavily populated with LGBT-themed content. This may mean nothing, or it could reflect his personal identity. 

An affinity for media that explores gay relationships or themes might resonate with him on a personal level. Or he’s trying to better understand himself and desires he hasn’t revealed to you.

29. He Overemphasizes His Love of Women

Is he over-the-top in his comments about how much he adores women? Has he even made disparaging comments about gay men?

He might assert his attraction to women in a way that feels overdone or unnatural. This can sometimes be a cover, a way to dispel doubts or questions about his sexuality without directly addressing them.

30. He Has Friendships with Guys That He Keeps Secret

He tells you he’s meeting up with “Steve,” but he won’t tell you anything about him. He goes out with the guys, but you later find out it is just one guy that you’ve never heard of. When you question him, he gets defensive.

Secretive behavior with a romantic partner can suggest infidelity, or in this case, it might reveal his interest in men – whether or not there’s a full-blown affair happening.

31. You Just Feel It

Something inside of you is screaming that things are off. It’s not that he’s unkind or ignoring you. Maybe your sex life is ok. But you can’t get rid of the nagging feeling that he might be gay or bisexual.

Your instincts have served you well so far, so pay attention to them now. You’re picking up on something you can’t immediately identify, but that doesn’t mean you’re wrong.

Why Would a Guy Hide Being Gay with His Girlfriend?

The reasons for hiding being gay or bisexual in a heterosexual relationship are multifaceted and deeply personal, often tied to fears, societal pressures, and internal conflicts. Here are some key reasons why:

• Fear of Rejection: The dread of losing loved ones, friends and the comfort of established relationships can be overwhelming.
• Social Stigma: Societal prejudices and stereotypes about being gay or bisexual can deter men from coming out.
• Family Expectations: The pressure to conform to traditional family expectations can be a powerful force in keeping one’s true self hidden.
• Professional Concerns: Concerns about potential repercussions in the workplace or career prospects can lead to a life lived in the shadows.
• Internalized Homophobia: Growing up in environments that stigmatize LGBT identities can lead to self-denial and shame.
• Uncertainty About One’s Identity: Some men might still be exploring or coming to terms with their sexuality and are not ready to share this journey publicly.
• Preservation of the Relationship: The desire to maintain a relationship that provides emotional support, companionship, or financial stability might outweigh the drive to live openly.

Can a Man Seem Gay But Actually Be Straight?

Stereotypes often blur the lines, leading to assumptions about a man’s sexuality based on interests, behavior, or mannerisms. It’s crucial to remember that these external traits don’t define one’s sexual orientation. A man might exhibit qualities or interests traditionally associated with being gay yet identify as straight. These can include:

• Fashion Sense: The idea that a keen fashion sense or a well-groomed appearance equates to being gay is a common stereotype. Style is a personal choice and not indicative of one’s sexual orientation.
• Interests and Hobbies: Associating interests such as theater, dance, or even certain sports with being gay overlooks the diversity of individual passions and pursuits.
• Emotional Expressiveness: The stereotype that men who are open with their feelings or who form close emotional bonds with other men must be gay disregards the healthy human need for emotional connection and expression.

It’s essential to challenge these stereotypes and recognize that human behavior and interests are vast and varied, transcending simplistic labels. Understanding and respecting this complexity allows for a more inclusive view of masculinity and identity.

What Should I Do If I Find Out My Boyfriend Is Gay?

Discovering that your boyfriend may be gay can be a surprising and potentially emotional revelation. It’s a situation that calls for sensitivity, open-mindedness, and compassion from both partners. Here’s how you can navigate this delicate scenario:

Communicate Openly

Start a dialogue with him in a safe and non-judgmental space. Express your feelings and concerns while encouraging him to share his own. This open line of communication is crucial for understanding each other’s perspectives and feelings.

Offer Support

Understand that coming to terms with one’s sexuality can be a tumultuous journey. Offer your support and let him know that you’re there for him, regardless of the nature of your relationship moving forward.

Seek Understanding

Educate yourself about the complexities of sexual orientation. This knowledge can foster empathy and insight, helping you navigate your feelings and the situation with greater awareness.

Consider Your Own Needs

While supporting your boyfriend, don’t neglect your own emotional needs. It’s okay to seek support for yourself, whether from friends, family, or professionals, as you process your own emotions and decide on the next steps.

Respect His Journey

Recognize that everyone’s journey with their sexuality is personal and unique. Respect his process of self-discovery and decision-making, even if it means the dynamics of your relationship may change.

Discuss the Future

Consider the future of your relationship together. This might involve redefining your relationship in a way that respects both your needs and his, or it might mean parting ways amicably.

Maintain Privacy

Respect his privacy by keeping the details of his sexual orientation confidential unless he has given explicit consent to share this information with others.

What to Do If a Guy You Like Is Gay and Wants to Be Just Friends

When the guy you’re interested in reveals he’s gay and sees you purely as a friend, it stirs a mix of emotions. First and foremost, acknowledge your feelings—it’s okay to feel disappointed or confused. 

Embracing his honesty is crucial; it’s a sign of trust and respect. Focus on the value of the friendship you share, remembering that genuine connections are multifaceted and not solely defined by romance and sex. The bond of friendship often proves to be one of life’s most enduring and rewarding relationships.

Once you move past the initial disappointment, use the situation as an opportunity to broaden your understanding and support for the LGBTQ+ community. 

Final Thoughts

Navigating a relationship in which love and identity are in question can be daunting, especially when faced with the fear that your partner might not be straight. It’s hard to know what to ask or what to say if you discover he is gay or bi. Seeking clarity with compassion and openness can help you better understand him and, ultimately, to paths where both your hearts find true fulfillment.

Something’s off, and you know it. 

You’ve had a hard time putting your finger on it until recently.

Now you wonder if your guy hasn’t been truthful with you: he’s acting straight when it’s increasingly clear he isn’t.

When it comes to sexual orientation, society has imposed certain norms and expectations that can make things tricky. 

It’s not uncommon for people to struggle with their sexual identity, especially when being gay, bisexual, or queer can still be met with discrimination and rejection. 

These attitudes can lead some to hide their sexual orientation, often going to great lengths to present as straight. 

How do you know if someone is genuinely heterosexual or pretending to be?

Let’s explore some telling signs indicating that your boyfriend is hiding something about their true sexual identity.

Why Would a Guy Pretend to Be Straight? 

It’s more common than not for gay or bisexual people to hide their sexual preferences. A study by the Yale School of Public Health reveals that “The vast majority of the world’s sexual minority population — an estimated 83 percent of those who identify as lesbian, gay or bisexual — keep their orientation hidden from all or most of the people in their lives.”

For most people, coming out as gay or bisexual can be a complicated and intimidating process. The fear of being judged or ostracized prevents them from fully embracing their true identity.

As a result, some men pretend to be straight to avoid facing these challenges or to fit in with societal expectations. Or maybe they’re still unclear themselves.

There are many reasons why a guy might pretend to be straight. Here are some of the most common ones:

• Fear of discrimination: Sadly, discrimination, prejudice, and intolerance against LGBTQ individuals remain prevalent. It even comes from those closest to them, which can significantly deter someone from trying to come out.
• Social pressure: In many cultures, heterosexuality is considered the norm. Anything outside of that is often stigmatized or frowned upon. It can create immense pressure for men attracted to other men to hide their true feelings, live in secrecy, or conform to societal expectations.
• Internalized homophobia: Some men may struggle with shame or discomfort around their sexuality. This internalized homophobia can lead them to deny their true identity and pretend to be straight to cope.
• Prior experience: If a gay or bisexual man has had a negative experience revealing his sexual orientation, he’s more likely to keep it concealed to prevent a similar reaction.

19 Signs a Guy is Pretending To Be Straight

If you’ve wondered if he’s pretending to be straight but is actually gay, there are a few key signs you can look out for. Some are more obvious than others, but they can paint a clearer picture when observed together.

1. He Avoids Conversations about Sexuality

If you’ve noticed that your boyfriend seems uncomfortable or evasive when the topic of sexual orientation comes up, this could be a red flag. 

He may change the subject quickly or seem disinterested in talking about anything related to LGBTQ issues. He may also become agitated or defensive if the conversation continues. 

This could be a sign that he’s hiding something about his sexual identity and is trying to avoid any potential questions or comments.

2. He Is Overly Close to One Male Friend

While having close male friends is entirely normal, it can be cause for concern if your boyfriend seems overly attached to one person in particular. 

If he’s always texting or calling this individual and insists on spending time with him, even when other friends are present, this could be a sign that something deeper is going on.

It could indicate that your partner is attracted to this individual or has a secret relationship with him. 

3. He Doesn’t Show Interest in Women

Naturally, many heterosexual men will show interest in women – even women who aren’t their partners or spouses. 

Many women can attest to catching their partners taking second glances at other women or even flirting with them. 

If your partner seems indifferent to the presence of women or shows no interest in them, he may not be romantically attracted to them. Instead, he is interested in men.

4. He Is Secretive About His Personal Life

Does your man keep many aspects of his life a secret? He may be hiding his true identity. 

He may be vague about how he spends his time or who he’s been hanging out with. He may also be reluctant to share details about past relationships or how he identifies with his sexuality.

All these things can be clues that your partner is not completely honest with you.

5. You Catch Him Staring at Other Men

While it’s normal for people to appreciate physical beauty, if your boyfriend seems to be fixated on other men’s bodies or appearance, it’s worth considering whether he might be struggling with his sexuality. 

Of course, he may be simply admiring another guy’s style or physical fitness, but if he seems to be going out of his way to look at men or can’t take his eyes off them, it’s worth exploring further. 

Remember that this isn’t necessarily a definitive sign that he’s pretending to be straight, but it could be one piece of a larger puzzle.

6. He’s Openly Prejudiced Against LGBTQ People

According to research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, people who identify as heterosexual yet show a strong attraction to the same sex in psychological tests may be threatened by those who identify as gay or lesbian. 

This reaction is likely because homosexuals remind them of similar tendencies within themselves, making them confront an inner conflict they are uncomfortable with. 

If your boyfriend is openly prejudiced against LGBTQ people, it could be a sign that he’s trying to overcompensate for his feelings.

7. He’s Overly Interested in Your LGBTQ Friends 

While there’s nothing wrong with being curious about other people’s lives, if he seems overly fascinated by their sexuality, it could indicate that he’s struggling with his feelings. 

He may be using his interest in your LGBTQ friends to explore his attraction to men without fully admitting it to himself or you.

Additionally, suppose he constantly asks questions about your LGBTQ friends’ relationships or sexual experiences. In that case, it could be a sign that he’s trying to gather information about what it’s like to be in a same-sex relationship. 

8. He Focuses on His Masculinity

It’s natural for people to want to be accepted by their peers, and having a strong sense of masculinity is often seen as a way of fitting in, especially in male-dominant spaces. 

However, if your boyfriend constantly talks about how masculine he is or how much he likes “guy stuff,” it could reveal that he’s trying to overcompensate for his true sexual orientation. 

He might also need to prove his masculinity to reassure himself of his heterosexuality.

9. He Frequently Jokes About Being Gay

Many men who are in the closet use humor as a way to deflect attention from their true feelings.

By making light of the situation or joking about being gay, they may attempt to distance themselves from their true sexuality and avoid suspicion. 

Additionally, making these types of jokes can be a way for them to test the waters and gauge your reaction. 

Responding negatively can confirm their fears and reinforce their decision to stay in the closet. On the other hand, if you respond positively, it could encourage them to open up and be more honest about their true identity.

10. He Has Phone Apps Related to Gay Men

If your boyfriend has apps on his phone associated with the LGBT community, such as Grindr or Scruff, it’s another indication that he’s struggling to understand how he identifies. 

Even if he claims these apps are just for “research” or “networking” purposes, it’s worth looking at how he uses them and how often.

11. Your Intuition Tells You Something Isn’t Right

Sometimes the best indicator of how someone identifies can come from your own gut feeling.

If you’re in a relationship with a guy who seems to be hiding something, it’s worth exploring how he’s feeling on a deeper level and why he may not be open about how he identifies. 

Even though this is a difficult conversation, it could help you both clarify how he truly feels.

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12. He Never Seems Interested in Intimacy With You

It’s not uncommon for men who are in the closet to avoid physical intimacy with their partners, as they may be too afraid of how it could make them feel. 

If he seems uninterested in sex with you or only engages when you insist upon it, he’s likely struggling with his sexuality.

13. He Never Uses Gender-Specific Pronouns When Talking About Past Relationships

When a guy pretends to be straight, he may avoid using gender-specific pronouns when discussing past relationships.

Instead of saying, “I dated a girl in college,” he may say something like, “I dated someone in college,” or “I was in a relationship a few years ago.” 

It could be because he is uncomfortable acknowledging his same-sex experiences or because he wants to maintain the illusion that he is exclusively attracted to women.

14. He Has a Lot of Male Friends Who Are Openly Gay or Bisexual

He may feel more comfortable around them because they are not judging him for his sexuality. Additionally, he may use these friendships to distance himself from any suspicion that he is gay. 

However, it’s important to note that having close LGBTQIA+ friends does not necessarily mean someone is pretending to be straight, as people of different sexual orientations can have close friendships.

Therefore, looking at the other signs and behaviors is essential.

15. He Is Overly Concerned with His Appearance and How Other Men Perceive Him

He may try to fit into the traditional masculine stereotype to avoid suspicion about his sexuality. 

He may spend a lot of time grooming, working out, or dressing in a certain way to appear more masculine. He may also be preoccupied with his behavior around other men, avoiding any actions or words that may be seen as gay. 

Overall, his concern with his appearance and behavior around men may be a way to cover up his true sexual orientation.

16. He Shows an Unusual Interest in Male Celebrities or Athletes

It’s not unusual for most people to have a celebrity or athlete they admire.

However, suppose your guy is extremely interested in certain male celebrities or athletes and always talks about how attractive he finds them. In that case, this could be another sign that he is hiding his sexuality. 

He may also spend a lot of time watching videos or photos of these men, which could allow him to explore how he feels within a “safe environment.”

17. Others Have Mentioned It

If other people have mentioned that your boyfriend might be in the closet, it’s worth considering this as well. 

While these comments may not always be accurate, they could also come from a place of observation or first-hand knowledge. Remember, when you are in love or infatuated with someone, you may miss many obvious clues to others.

18. He Seems to Be More Interested in Watching or Talking about Gay Porn

This one might be slightly more obvious than the other signs, but it is still worth mentioning. If your man seems to be more interested in watching gay porn than heterosexual porn, this could indicate how he feels about his sexuality. 

Additionally, suppose he talks about same-sex fantasies or experiences with you that involve activities not typically associated with heterosexual relationships. In that case, this could also be a sign as well.

19. He Is Flirty with Men

Given he is in the closet, he may be subtly expressing his same-sex attraction by flirting with other men. 

This may present as complimenting and touching them in a way that goes beyond how one would typically interact with heterosexual acquaintances. It may be a sign that he feels sexually attracted to these men.

What to Do If You See These Closeted Man Signs

Once you have identified the signs that your partner might be in the closet, you should approach the situation with sensitivity and respect. Bisexual men (or gay men pretending to be straight) are especially fearful of the potential negative emotional reactions of their wives or girlfriends if they came out.

According to a study published in the National Library of Medicine, “Men frequently used words like ‘shocked,’ ‘hurt,’ ‘upset,’ ‘betrayed,’ and ‘devastated’ to describe their anticipated reactions. Men clearly wanted to avoid the emotional confrontations that they felt certain would result from disclosure.”

If you don’t want to hurt or alienate your male partner, consider these six things to do if you think your partner is in the closet:

1. Talk Openly and Respectfully

Even though you may feel deceived and angry, being respectful when talking with your partner is important. Avoid making accusations. Ask questions and try to understand their perspective and feelings.

Remember that your initial assumptions may not be accurate, so be prepared to listen and learn more.

2. Let Them Take the Lead

Your partner may feel more comfortable if they control how much information they share with you at any given time.

Don’t pressure them into revealing too much or giving an answer right away. Instead, give them space to process their thoughts and feelings.

3. Respect Their Privacy

Your partner’s sexuality is theirs alone, and you must respect their privacy. Avoid gossiping about them or telling anyone else, even if you feel frustrated.

Remember, how you handle this information can impact how comfortable they feel sharing it with others.

4. Educate Yourself and Offer Resources

If you’re not familiar with the LGBTQ+ community, take the time to educate yourself. Learn about the different identities and experiences that exist and how you can be a supportive ally

Let him know that resources are available to him if he’s ready to come out, such as support groups or online communities for LGBTQ+ individuals. You can also offer your own emotional and practical support if needed.

5. Get Professional Help

If the situation is causing distress or discomfort to either of you, seeking professional help may be helpful.

A therapist or counselor can provide unbiased support and guidance for both of you as you work through how to handle this situation.

6. Decide the Way Forward

Once you have had the conversation, it’s time to decide how to move forward. 

Do you want to remain in a relationship with them, or do you think it’s best if you both go your separate ways? Talk openly and honestly to figure out what works best for both of you.

Should I Stay with My Partner If He Says He’s Bisexual?

Learning your partner is bisexual might prompt a mix of emotions and questions. On the plus side, it’s a chance to deepen your relationship through honesty and openness. You’ll likely discover new layers of trust and intimacy.

However, it’s normal to feel uncertain or have concerns about what this means for your future together. Consider what’s most important to you in the relationship and communicate openly about your feelings and boundaries.

Here are six key points to address:

• Communication: Ensure ongoing, honest dialogue about your feelings, desires, and any concerns that arise.
• Understanding Bisexuality: Ask questions about bisexuality to dispel myths and understand your partner’s perspective.
• Trust: Reinforce the foundation of trust in your relationship, recognizing that his sexual orientation doesn’t inherently change his commitment to you.
• Boundaries: Discuss and agree upon boundaries that respect both your needs and comfort levels.
• Support System: Consider seeking support from friends, family, or professionals who can offer understanding and advice.
• Personal Reflection: Reflect on your own feelings and needs within the relationship, acknowledging and addressing any insecurities or questions you may have.

Final Thoughts

Recognizing the signs that a guy may be pretending to be straight can help you navigate the complexities of your relationship with greater understanding and empathy. While it’s crucial to be honest with each other and address any concerns you may have, remember that compassion and respect are paramount.

Saturday nights can be magical if you know how to spend them right. 

Whether you’re solo or surrounded by friends, under a starlit sky or city neon lights, you’ll love our treasure trove of 67+ Saturday-night-worthy activities to keep you busy for more than a year’s worth of weekends. 

From cozy nights at home to adrenaline-pumping adventures, from cultural escapades to urban excursions, we’ve curated a list of ideas to transform your ordinary Saturdays into unforgettable ones. 

Ready to make every weekend a memory worth revisiting?

Dive right in.

Things to Do on a Saturday Night: 67 Fun Ways to Celebrate or Relax

Want to inject more fun into your Saturday nights? 

Fear not, as we’re about to explore a diverse spectrum of activities that will breathe new life into your weekend routine.

Let the Saturday night shenanigans begin!

Solo Soirées: Fun Things to Do Alone on a Saturday Night

1. Binge-Watch a New Series

Dive into the latest trending series everyone’s raving about. Snuggle up with some snacks and explore new worlds right from your couch. The best part? No one’s there to steal the remote!

2. Get Lost in a Good Book

Crack open that book you’ve been meaning to read. Reading not only transports you to different realities but also helps you unwind and relax.

3. Cook a Fancy Meal

Roll up your sleeves and whip up a gourmet dinner. Use this time to experiment with new recipes or perfect your signature dish. No need to share the results, either—it’s all for you.

4. DIY Spa Night

Create your very own spa at home. Light some scented candles, play soothing music, and indulge in pampering treatments. You’ll wake up on Sunday morning feeling rejuvenated.

5. Tackle a Personal Project

Got a project you’ve been putting off? Dedicate your Saturday night to it. Whether it’s crafting, painting, or coding, let your creativity flow.

6. Online Gaming

Spend your evening battling foes or building empires in your favorite online game. It’s a fantastic way to make friends from all over the globe.

7. Explore a New Hobby

Use this free time to delve into a hobby you’ve always wanted to try. Quilting, calligraphy, or maybe learning a new language? The world is your oyster!

Embracing the Outdoors: Saturday Night Adventures Under the Stars

8. Star Gazing

On clear nights, what could be better than lying on a blanket and gazing up at the stars? Grab a star chart and make a game of spotting different constellations. The night sky’s serenity is the perfect weekend stress-buster.

9. Moonlit Hike

For adventurous souls, a moonlit hike offers a unique experience. The tranquility and beauty of nature at night is a different kind of thrill. Remember to pack a headlamp and always tell someone where you’re going.

10. Wine Tasting Party

Host a wine tasting at home. Everyone brings a bottle, and you can all discover new favorites together. Don’t forget the cheese and crackers!

11. Nighttime Picnic

Pack a dinner, bring a blanket, and find a nice spot under a tree. A picnic under the stars is a simple yet romantic way to spend a Saturday evening.

12. Camping Out

Experience the great outdoors in its entirety by camping out. From setting up a tent to cooking over a fire, the adventure starts the moment you step out of your door.

13. Outdoor Movie Night

Set up a projector in your backyard and invite your friends for an outdoor movie night. Don’t forget the popcorn!

14. Nighttime Photography

With the right settings, your camera can capture stunning images at night. Go on a photographic adventure, chasing the perfect shots of a moonlit landscape or the city skyline.

15. Late-Night Bike Ride

Cycling at night when the roads are quieter can be peaceful and exhilarating. Remember to wear reflective clothing and ensure your bike lights are working.

16. Geocaching

Turn your evening into a treasure hunt with geocaching. Using a GPS-enabled device, you’ll locate hidden containers around your city. It’s a fun way to discover new places.

17. Garden Party

Hosting a garden party is a fantastic way to enjoy a balmy summer night. Decorate with fairy lights, play some soft music, and enjoy good food and great company.

Group Gatherings: Interactive Activities for a Fun-Filled Saturday with Friends

18. Game Night

Invite your friends over for a fun-filled evening of board games, card games, or video games. Friendly competition, snacks, and laughter are the perfect ingredients for a memorable Saturday night.

19. Themed Potluck Dinner

Assign a theme and have everyone bring a dish that fits. This could range from Mexican night to a vegan feast, allowing you to explore different cuisines while spending quality time together.

20. DIY Escape Room

Design your own escape room at home. It’s a creative and fun way to challenge your group and see how well you can work together under pressure.

21. Movie Marathon

Whether you choose the latest blockbusters, nostalgic classics, or B-movie gems, a movie marathon is always a great way to spend time together.

22. DIY Craft Night

Get together and create! Painting, knitting, or making DIY decor – there are so many great ways to unleash your creativity.

23. Beach Bonfire

If you’re near the coast, a bonfire on the beach makes a perfect Saturday night. Roast marshmallows, share stories, and enjoy the soothing sound of the waves.

24. Cooking Competition

Who doesn’t love a good cook-off? Choose a dish or ingredient and see who can make the best version.

25. Karaoke Night

Belting out your favorite tunes with friends never gets old. You don’t need a machine, just a music streaming service, and a makeshift microphone.

26. Charity Run

If your group is active, why not participate in a charity run? It’s a great way to stay fit, have fun, and contribute to a good cause.

27. Volunteering

Choose a local organization and spend your Saturday night giving back to the community. It’s a fulfilling way to spend time with friends.

Cultural Pursuits: Enriching Ways to Spend Your Saturday Night

28. Visit a Night Museum

Many museums have extended hours on weekends or special night events. It’s a unique way to enjoy culture and art without the daytime crowds.

29. Attend a Theatre Performance

Whether it’s a local play, a Broadway musical, or a contemporary dance show, spending your Saturday night at a theatre can be a captivating experience.

30. Explore the Local Music Scene

From jazz clubs to rock concerts, music is a universal language that brings people together. Check out local gigs and discover new bands and artists.

31. Take a Cooking Class

If you love food and culture, why not combine the two? Sign up for a cooking class focusing on a particular cuisine and learn some delicious new recipes.

32. Wine or Beer Tasting

Many wineries and breweries offer tasting events. Learn about the process, the different varieties, and of course, enjoy the tasting!

33. Book Club Meeting

Gather your literary friends and host a book club meeting. It’s a fantastic way to explore different perspectives and have enriching conversations.

34. Visit a Night Market

Night markets often offer a blend of food, artisan crafts, and local culture. They can be a vibrant way to spend a Saturday evening.

35. Attend a Poetry Slam or Open Mic Night

Whether you’re an aspiring poet or just love hearing creative expressions, poetry slams or open mic nights can be an emotionally enriching experience.

36. Watch a Foreign Film

Expand your cinematic horizons by watching a critically acclaimed foreign film. It’s a fantastic way to appreciate different cultures and storytelling styles.

37. Join a Cultural Festival

Festivals celebrating different cultures often have music, dance, food, and crafts. Check out what’s happening in your city and join in the festivities!

Saturday Night in the City: Urban Excursions for an Exciting Evening

38. Rooftop Bar Hopping

Experience your city from new heights by visiting rooftop bars. Each offers a unique perspective, signature cocktails, and a vibrant atmosphere.

39. Late-Night Shopping

Some cities offer late-night shopping on Saturdays. Grab a friend and indulge in some retail therapy, minus the usual crowds.

40. Food Truck Fiesta

Sample diverse culinary delights by visiting local food trucks. It’s a fantastic way to enjoy the city’s culinary scene and discover new favorite eats.

41. Sunset City Tour

Take an evening tour of your city. As the city lights start twinkling, landmarks and sights take on a different, magical feel.

42. Comedy Club

Need a laugh? Visit a local comedy club. Stand-up shows are great for light-hearted fun and often showcase local talent.

43. Dance Class

From salsa to hip-hop, taking a dance class can be a fun and active way to spend your Saturday night. Plus, it’s a great way to meet new people.

44. Art Gallery Opening

Art gallery openings often happen on weekends and offer a chance to meet local artists, see new art, and enjoy the city’s creative pulse.

45. Jazz or Piano Bar

Immerse yourself in the soulful sound of a live jazz band or enjoy the intimate setting of a piano bar. Music and ambiance combined make for a classy Saturday night.

46. Trivia Night at a Local Pub

Join a trivia night for a friendly competition and a chance to show off your general knowledge. It’s fun, interactive, and often comes with the chance of winning some prizes.

47. Exploring Iconic Landmarks

Famous city landmarks are often beautifully lit at night. It’s the perfect time to take some stunning photographs and appreciate the beauty of your city.

48. Restaurant Hop

Choose a part of your city known for its restaurants and eat each course at a different place. Start with appetizers at one restaurant, then move to another for your main course, and end up somewhere else for dessert.

49. Explore a New Neighborhood

Discover the charm of a different part of town. Wander through its streets, visit unique shops, and get a feel for its vibe.

50. Attend a Live Sports Event

If your city has a local sports team, why not support them? The energy in the stadium is infectious, making for a thrilling night out.

51. Street Art Tour

Many cities are known for their vibrant street art. Plan a tour around your city’s most famous murals. Remember to take photos!

52. Visit a Night Market

Night markets are usually buzzing with energy, full of unique finds, tasty food, and often live music. It’s a fun and dynamic way to enjoy the city’s nightlife.

53. Attend a Concert

Whether it’s a big-name band or an up-and-coming local group, a live music concert is always an unforgettable experience.

54. Outdoor Workout Class

Some fitness clubs offer outdoor classes at night. It’s a fun way to stay active and enjoy the cooler evening temperatures.

55. Ghost Walk or Haunted House Visit

For those who enjoy a thrill, joining a ghost walk or visiting a haunted house can be a spooky and exciting way to spend a Saturday night.

56. Roller Skating

Whether it’s at a local rink or a park, roller skating can be a fun, nostalgic, and active way to spend your evening.

57. Night at the Amusement Park

Many amusement parks have special evening hours, where you can enjoy the rides, games, and fun in a whole new light. Plus, lines are usually shorter!

Bonus Ideas: 10 Wild, Crazy, and Unique Things to Do on a Saturday Night

58. Ghost Hunting

If you’re up for a thrill, gather your bravest friends and spend a Saturday night ghost hunting. Research local haunted spots to explore. Don’t forget your flashlight!

59. Glow-in-the-Dark Paint Party

Host a glow-in-the-dark paint party at home. Get some UV paints and black lights, and you’ve got an incredible night full of color and creativity.

60. Zorbing

This unique activity involves rolling down a hill in a large, transparent ball called a zorb. If you’re lucky enough to have a zorbing location nearby, this can be an exciting and unusual way to spend your evening.

61. Random Road Trip

Get in the car, choose a direction, and just drive. You never know what adventures await on a spontaneous road trip. Remember to stay safe and let someone know your plans.

62. Attend a Murder Mystery Dinner

These interactive dinner experiences can be a lot of fun. You and your friends play the characters in a murder mystery, trying to solve the crime while enjoying a delicious meal.

63. Flash Mob

Organize or join a flash mob. It takes some planning and coordination, but it’s a fantastic and fun way to surprise people in a public space with a choreographed performance.

64. Full Moon Party

Host a full moon party in your backyard. Decorate with lunar-themed decorations, serve moon pies, and celebrate the natural beauty of the moon.

65. Silent Disco

With headphones playing the music, a silent disco allows you to dance like no one’s watching—because they can’t hear your music. It’s an exciting and unique experience you’ll never forget.

66. Skydiving Simulator

If you’re not quite ready to jump out of a plane but want the sensation of flying, try a skydiving simulator. It’s an adrenaline-packed way to spend a Saturday night.

67. Overnight Zoo Visit

Some zoos offer overnight experiences, giving you the opportunity to see nocturnal animals in their element. It’s a unique and exciting way to appreciate wildlife.

What Can You Do By Yourself on a Saturday Night?

Hey, just because it’s Saturday night doesn’t mean you need someone else to have a good time! If you find yourself alone, embrace the freedom to do whatever your heart desires. 

Binge-watch that series you’ve been meaning to start, or crack open that book collecting dust on your shelf. You can order your favorite takeout and savor every bite without sharing, and unleash your creativity by painting, writing, or crafting to your heart’s content. 

If you’re feeling adventurous, explore a new part of town and treat yourself to a movie or a delicious meal. Almost any activity on our list here could be a fun solo activity. 

How Can You Go Out and Meet People on a Saturday Night?

If you’re looking to expand your social circle or simply want to connect with new faces, Saturday night is the perfect time to venture out and meet people. Whether you’re an extrovert or a bit on the shy side, there are plenty of ways to put yourself out there and strike up conversations. Here are some ideas to get you started:

• Attend a local event or festival: Check out what’s happening in your area, such as live music performances, art exhibitions, or food festivals. These gatherings are great opportunities to mingle with like-minded people who share your interests.
• Join a meetup group: Browse through meetup.com to find groups that align with your hobbies or passions. Many of these groups organize weekend activities, making it easy to connect with new people in a structured setting.
• Visit a popular bar or club: Head to a bustling venue known for its lively atmosphere. Strike up conversations with people at the bar or on the dance floor, and don’t be afraid to introduce yourself to someone who catches your eye.
• Attend a trivia night or game night at a local bar: Many bars host themed nights on weekends, such as trivia competitions or board game gatherings. These events provide a fun and engaging environment to meet new people while showcasing your knowledge or strategizing skills.

Final Thoughts

Ready to make your Saturday nights unforgettable? With these diverse and exciting ideas, every weekend promises a new adventure waiting to be discovered. Break away from the usual and embrace the potential of your Saturday evenings. Here’s to vibrant weekends full of discovery, fun, and unforgettable moments!

Everyone appreciates a little romance in their lives — even uber macho men.

They may not be into public displays of affection, but a dash of private mushiness is almost always A-OK. 

Sometimes, making him shed a tear can bring you closer together.

To that end, we’ve written 17 love poems that will make your boyfriend cry.

Feel free to use them for yourself — or tailor some tweaks to suit your man. 

How Do I Write a Love Poem to My Boyfriend? 

Writing a love poem to your boyfriend should be enjoyable — not stressful.

Here are a few tips on getting it done, making it fun, and not embarrassing yourself if you decide to write one of your own.

• Timing: Did you just start dating? If so, you may want to hold off. Coming on too strongly is rarely, if ever, a good look.
• Topic: Are you in the first month of the relationship? Then stick to something funnier or light-hearted. There’s no need to send messages about love, soulmates, or marriage so soon.
• Relationship: Be honest with yourself about the type of relationship it is. If it’s more of a “situationship,” you may want to hold off on the love poems.
• Embarrassment Factor: How well do you know this guy? Will he blast your poem to everyone on his social media, or will he keep it private? 
• Authenticity: Send a poem that fits your personality and his. Don’t try to be someone you’re not.
• Thoughtfulness: Be thoughtful about what you write. For example, don’t say something that will trigger a bad memory. 

17 Love Poems for Your Boyfriend That Will Make Him Cry

You’ve thought about it and are in the market for boyfriend poems that will make him cry – or at least feel the pangs of love.

We’ve curated 17 famous love poems to inspire you.

Use them for ideas to write a poem yourself, or just send him one of these as is to let him know how you feel.

1. Untitled by Christopher Poindexter

His eyes were like 
clocks that stopped
spinning the moment
she stared into
them. The universe
halted. All things
began to breathe
each others stillness.
To her: it was
a simple, blue,
Eternity.

2. I Am Not Yours by Sara Teasdale

I am not yours, not lost in you,
Not lost, although I long to be
Lost as a candle lit at noon,
Lost as a snowflake in the sea.
You love me, and I find you still
A spirit beautiful and bright,
Yet I am I, who long to be
Lost as a light is lost in light.
Oh plunge me deep in love—put out
My senses, leave me deaf and blind,
Swept by the tempest of your love,
A taper in a rushing wind.

3. Love Comes Quietly by Robert Creeley

Love comes quietly,
finally, drops
about me, on me,
in the old ways.
What did I know
thinking myself
able to go
alone all the way.

4. The Floating Poem by Adrienne Rich

Whatever happens with us, your body
will haunt mine—tender, delicate
your lovemaking, like the half-curled frond
of the fiddlehead fern in forests
just washed by sun. Your traveled, generous thighs
between which my whole face has come and come—
the innocence and wisdom of the place my tongue has found there—
the live, insatiate dance of your nipples in my mouth—
your touch on me, firm, protective, searching
me out, your strong tongue and slender fingers
reaching where I had been waiting years for you
in my rose-wet cave—whatever happens, this is.

4. Defeated by Love by Rumi

The sky was lit
by the splendor of the moon
So powerful
I fell to the ground
Your love
has made me sure
I am ready to forsake
this worldly life
And surrender
to the magnificence
of your Being

5. I Love You by Harry Boslem

I can’t talk to you without feeling honor.
I can’t see you without feeling wonder.
I can’t touch you without feeling pure.
I can’t feel you without wanting more.
I can’t hold you without feeling safe.
I can’t kiss you without feeling great.
I can’t miss you without feeling pain.
I can’t meet you without wanting to again.
I can’t watch you without feeling awe.
I can’t love you without feeling loved.
I can’t lay with you without feeling passion.
I can’t stay away without feeling rationed.
I can’t dream of you without sleeping soundly.
I can’t cope without you around me.
I can’t sleep without you in the bed.
I can’t be alive without feeling your breath.
I can’t think without you on my mind.
I can’t leave without feeling unkind.
But most of all,
I can’t exist without you in my life

6. It’s Your Flaws I Want to Taste by Lora Mathis

It’s your flaws
I want to taste.
Your crooked mouth.
The way you smell after
being out all day.
The lump in your throat.
Your shaky hands.
Your morning breath.
Your prickly legs.
Your pimpled politeness.
Your tangled hair.
I don’t want to be able to
run my fingers through you
easily. It’s no fun writing
about perfections.
I want to talk about you-
flawed,
crooked,
endless
you.

7. Poem for My Love by June Jordon

How do we come to be here next to each other
in the night
Where are the stars that show us to our love
inevitable
Outside the leaves flame usual in darkness
and the rain
falls cool and blessed on the holy flesh
the black men waiting on the corner for
a womanly mirage
I am amazed by peace
It is this possibility of you
asleep
and breathing in the quiet air

8. I Love You by Ella Wheeler Wilcox

I love your lips when they’re wet with wine
And red with a wild desire;
I love your eyes when the lovelight lies
Lit with a passionate fire.
I love your arms when the warm white flesh
Touches mine in a fond embrace;
I love your hair when the strands enmesh
Your kisses against my face.
Not for me the cold, calm kiss
Of a virgin’s bloodless love;
Not for me the saint’s white bliss,
Nor the heart of a spotless dove.
But give me the love that so freely gives
And laughs at the whole world’s blame,
With your body so young and warm in my arms,
It sets my poor heart aflame.
So kiss me sweet with your warm wet mouth,
Still fragrant with ruby wine,
And say with a fervor born of the South
That your body and soul are mine.
Clasp me close in your warm young arms,
While the pale stars shine above,
And we’ll live our whole young lives away
In the joys of a living love.

9. I loved you first: but afterwards your love by Christina Rossetti

I loved you first: but afterwards your love
Outsoaring mine, sang such a loftier song
As drowned the friendly cooings of my dove.
Which owes the other most? my love was long,
And yours one moment seemed to wax more strong;
I loved and guessed at you, you construed me
And loved me for what might or might not be –
Nay, weights and measures do us both a wrong.
For verily love knows not ‘mine’ or ‘thine;’
With separate ‘I’ and ‘thou’ free love has done,
For one is both and both are one in love:
Rich love knows nought of ‘thine that is not mine;’
Both have the strength and both the length thereof,
Both of us, of the love which makes us one.

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10. Love’s Coming by Ella Wheeler Wilcox

She had looked for his coming as warriors come,
With the clash of arms and the bugle’s call;
But he came instead with a stealthy tread,
Which she did not hear at all.
She had thought how his armor would blaze in the sun,
As he rode like a prince to claim his bride:
In the sweet dim light of the falling night
She found him at her side.
She had dreamed how the gaze of his strange, bold eye
Would wake her heart to a sudden glow:
She found in his face the familiar grace
Of a friend she used to know.
She had dreamed how his coming would stir her soul,
As the ocean is stirred by the wild storm’s strife:
He brought her the balm of a heavenly calm,
And a peace which crowned her life.

11. Not Anyone Who Says by Mary Oliver

Not anyone who says, “I’m going to be
careful and smart in matters of love,”
who says, “I’m going to choose slowly,”
but only those lovers who didn’t choose at all
but were, as it were, chosen
by something invisible and powerful and uncontrollable
and beautiful and possibly even
unsuitable —
only those know what I’m talking about
in this talking about love.

12. I’d Be Lying by Rupi Kaur

I’d be lying if I said
you make me speechless
the truth is you make my
tongue so weak it forgets
what language to speak in.

13. The Minute I Heard My First Love Story by Rumi

The minute I heard my first love story,
I started looking for you, not knowing
how blind that was.
Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere,
they’re in each other all along.

14. How Do I Love Thee by Elizabeth Barrett Browning

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, — I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! — and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

15. Someone to Walk with Me by Raquel Franco

I was never looking
for another half
to make me whole,
just someone
who was willing
to walk with me
no matter how far
I strayed.

16. Tonight by Sara Teasdale

The moon is a curving flower of gold,
The sky is still and blue;
The moon was made for the sky to hold,
And I for you;
The moon is a flower without a stem,
The sky is luminous;
Eternity was made for them,
To-night for us.

17. Wild Nights – Wild Nights! By Emily Dickinson

Wild nights – Wild nights!
Were I with thee
Wild nights should be
Our luxury!
Futile – the winds –
To a Heart in port –
Done with the Compass –
Done with the Chart!
Rowing in Eden –
Ah – the Sea!
Might I but moor – tonight –
In thee!

We hope our list of boyfriend love poems for him was helpful. Before pressing send, think it over, and if all signals are green — shoot one over.

You could continue to send quick texts to let her know how much you love her, although everyone does that.

It’s certainly an okay way to let her know she’s on your mind.

She most definitely appreciates the sentiment behind it, and it’s better than no message at all.

But why not go a step further?

Why not take a few extra minutes to send something special that shows you put some thought into it with these cute memes for her?

91Deep Love Memes For Her 

Whether you’re looking for a way to express your love, you want to make her laugh, or you want to melt her heart, there’s a meme for that!

Regardless of the stage of your relationship, how long you’ve been together, or what your personalities are like, you can find something that she’ll like without feeling like a giant cheeseball. 

She’ll undoubtedly love you even more– and wonder where your cute memes are coming from.

I Love You Memes for Her

1. What’s better than a romantic kiss in the rain? Expressing the sentiment–without getting wet!

2. To the point– with a feminine splash of color.

3. A sweet play on words for your special coffee lover.

4.  Soar into her notificaitons and her heart with this flying message.

5.  Sometimes love can’t be explained, so just go with it.

6.  Make a clear, bold declaration of love.

7. You love her, you love you, and you love the two of you together. 

8. Who wouldn’t like to hear I Love You from a winky-eyed pooch like this?

9. Let her know you love her today, tomorrow, and all the days to come. 

10. An early morning message sure to start her day right.

11. A little Will Ferrel never hurt anyone!

12. She’s better than life’s sweet treats any day of the year. 

13. When even a nanosecond is too long to be apart…

14. This little baby means serious business!

15. Your heart is full but you can’t come up with the words to tell her.

Image: Source

16. You’ve had some amazing experiences in life, but she’s at the top of the list.

17. No fork or spoon required! 

18. Let this happy furry face sing your I Love You’s for you.

19. Just thinking about your love for her makes you smile.

20. You’re irritated with life but not with her.

21. Ask for forgiveness with these sweet puppy-dog eyes.

22. Here’s a heartfelt way to express your passion for her.

Sweet Love Memes for Her

23. There aren’t many things cuter than kittens fight-kissing.

24. Nothing says I love you like a heart-shaped pizza.

25. You love everything about her and couldn’t possibly list it all.

26. Instead of trying to make the little box yourself, just send her this meme! 

27. Let her know you want her love and commitment.

28. There’s no one else for you. She’s your one and only. 

29. Tuck her in for bed by letting her know you’ll be thinking of her.

30. She fills your heart with love and happiness.

31. The guys are fun and everything, but sometimes there’s nothing better than staying in.

32. Shower her with lots of love.

33. Send her this when you can’t love her in person.

34. A playful gesture with a little innuendo behind it.

35. Let her know she’s the only one for you.

36. Add some spice to a sweet and simple message.

37. Of all the people in your life, she’s the best one.

38. Make it playful with a cute, cartoonish vibe.

39. Fancy virtual kisses are better than no kisses at all.

40. Use a sappy rhyme to let her know she’s the one for you.

41. When you crazy miss her and just need to hold on a little longer.

42. Let Jim Halpert help you win at the who’s- cuter- than- who game.

43. There’s nothing better than snuggling up with the one you love. 

44. Your girl keeps you on your toes– and you like it!

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Funny Love Memes for Her

45. A comical way to say she’s the best thing in your life.

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46. You have your share of disagreements, but you love her nonetheless. 

47. Lighten it up with a playful undertone.

48. Sometimes the people we love the most still work on our nerves.

49.  Make her chuckle witha small dose of bittersweet reality.

50. Kissing her is awesome and you want her to know it. 

51.  You’ve been together a while and are comfortable with each other.

52. Let her know you’re crazy about her. 

53. Here’s that comfort thing again! 

54. She stole your heart, and now she must walk the plank. Okay, not really. 

55. Make her blush by letting her know your V-day intentions.

56. There’s no shame in letting her know you like the way she looks. 

57. It’s fun to binge-watch a new show– assuming you can get to the binge part. 

58. This clear, albeit cheesy, message tells her there’s no one else for you.

59. Wow, that’s A LOT of love.

60. She must be pretty special to make you this happy.

61. Okay, this one is cheesy, too. But a little cheese is fine now and then.  

62. Let her know she’s attractive and you want her.

63. It really is the little things in life. 

64. You’ll put a smile on her face with this light-hearted quip.

65. This (overly) enthusiastic elf can send your message loud and clear.

66. It’s not true unless social media says so. 

Romantic Love Memes for Her

67. Let her know you always welcome her kisses. 

68. Even when you’re not together, you can think of her to make yourself smile.

69. The past doesn’t matter. Your focus is on the future– and she’s it.

70. Being together is so much better than not being together. 

71. There’s something calming about the love and security of a committed relationship.

72. Skip the florist and send flowers with this furry friend instead. 

73. Anyone can be in a relationship, but finding the right relationship is another story.

74. Your love feels deep and special. It’s meaningful in a way you can’t describe.

75. You don’t have to be religious to find this scripture moving. 

76. She means everything to you and nothing can keep you apart.

77. You somehow fall more in love with her every single day.

78. Let your girl know you think about her constantly to feel closer to her.

79. She’s your soulmate, plain and simple.

80. Make her feel warm and fuzzy inside with some heartfelt romance.

81. Her coworkers will be jealous when she says, “Awww,” and shows them your message.

82. This one will have her thinking about kissing you (which could create a passionate reunion!).

83. Your love is true, and you want to be with her forever.

84. She has your heart, but you don’t want it back. 

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85. True love runs deeper than shallow things like looks and possessions.  

86. The power of love is timeless. You feel it all day and all night.

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87. True love is passionate and all-consuming, filling your life to the brim.

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88. What every woman wants and needs from the man she loves.

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89. What else could a woman ask for from her man?

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90. Having someone love you for who you are, flaws and all, is the most secure feeling.

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91. There is so much love in the smallest moments.

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What Is the Most Romantic Saying for Her?

You know she’s the one when your heart skips a beat just thinking about her. Women crave heartfelt expressions of your unwavering love and commitment.

Whisper sweet nothings like “I can’t imagine my life without you” or “You’re my soulmate, my everything.” Show her she’s your queen with a simple “I love you more each day.” Trust me, those words will melt her heart and make her weak in the knees.

What Are 5 Good Love Quotes?

When it comes to expressing your love, sometimes it’s hard to find the right words. Draw inspiration from these five romantic and unique love quotes that capture the essence of your feelings:

1. “In a sea of people, my eyes will always search for you.”

2. “I may not be your first love, first kiss, or first date, but I want to be your last everything.”

3. “I choose you, and I’ll choose you over and over and over. Without pause, without a doubt, in a heartbeat. I’ll keep choosing you.”

4. “I never want to stop making memories with you.”

5. “I love you, not only for what you are but for what I am when I am with you.”

Fun Ways to Use These Deep Love Memes for Her

Now that you’ve got some heartwarming love memes, it’s time to put them to good use. Here are some creative ways to incorporate these deep love memes into your romantic gestures:

Share Them on Social Media

Post a love meme on your social media profile and tag your partner. This public display of affection will show her, and the world, just how much she means to you. Don’t forget to add a personal message to make it extra special.

Set Them as Your Phone Background

Save your favorite love meme as your phone’s lock screen or background image. Every time you use your phone, you’ll think of her, and when she sees it, she’ll know she’s always on your mind.

Create a Digital Photo Album

Compile a digital photo album filled with your cherished memories together, and intersperse relevant love memes throughout. This thoughtful gesture will take her on a romantic journey down memory lane.

Print and Frame Them

Print out your favorite love memes and frame them to create a unique gallery wall in your home. This constant reminder of your love will fill your space with positive energy and strengthen your bond.

Send a Surprise Email

Brighten up her workday by sending a surprise email featuring a sweet love meme. This unexpected gesture will put a smile on her face and help her power through even the toughest days with your love and support in mind.

Final Thoughts

Anyone can send a message that says, “I love you.” If you want to stand out, show her you care with memes to make her day. Use these sweet, funny, and romantic messages to let her know she’s on your mind– and your heart.